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sider. And
very
unhappy. He is also
losing valuable leadership training.
Avo id allowing inferiority and other
personality complexes to form–
teach him to develop talents and
abi lities, such as swimming. Give
your chi ldren opportunities to en–
gage in sports, recreational activi–
ties, etc. that will give them
confidence within their peer groups.
Teach them to make things, such as
cookies a nd doll clothes for girls and
model airplanes and boats for boys.
Go on hikes, picnics; buy a kite and
help them tly it ; take them to sports
events.
Fourth, develop your child's in–
terests as fully as you are able. H is
whole life will be richer. He will be
able to mix with a ll kinds of people
and real ize his fullleadership poten–
tia!. Oíd you ever notice that many
of the greatest leaders have a broad
range of interests and well-rounded
personalities?
Fifth . leach him the proper use of
power. Money is a form of power.
Your child should learn how 10 use
it wisely. A car is power. So is a
boat. roller skates, BB gun o r a bi–
cycle. Children will misuse these un-
less tra ined .
·
Sixlh, lcach your child to face tri–
als bravely. A broken toy can be a
majo r crisis if you're four. So can a
dead pet. Take time to put these
" trials" into perspective. A broken
toy can open the door for you to
explain the importance of buying
quali1y i1ems. or proper care of pos–
sessions, o r even principies of main –
tenance and repair. The dead pct is
different from a dead htiman. Teach
your chi ld th e difference. Just sitt ing
down and explaining the overview
will 1ake much of the st ing out of
the " 1rial."
lt
also helps narrow any
polential gcneration gap.
Your own example in facing your
tria ls is a lso important. lf you are
dressed to go out and your child
spills milk down your best ou tfit–
you have a trial. l f an otherwisc
calm a nd composed mother sud –
de nly becomes a screaming witch.
hurling abuse at a glass-shattering
pitch. hc r child will learn by cx–
ample not to face trials bravely. He
will a lso te nd to Hy apart in the face
of tria ls.
Actions speak louder than words.
Jf you expect your child to sta nd
The PLAIN TRUTH October-November 1977
firm in a crisis, you must stand firm
first.
Teach Them to Face the World
You should also teach your children
that there are pro blems in the
world- horrible, heartrending prob–
lems. T hen demonstrate that God
has the answers.
If someone becomes ill or in–
volved in an accident , there are rea–
sons- usually easily defined. Teach
your child. Show him the principie
of cause and effect. Show him how
to avoid the effect by following
God's way of life in the first place.
Older children will see pregnant
girls drop out of school. Show lhem
the effect on the girl , her family, the
boy and his fami ly, and even on the
un born child itself.
Bul take care! All children are
idealístic. They view th e world
lhrough rose-colored glasses, and
il's a good lhing lhey do. If any of us
could see a ll lhe evil, a nd all 1he
lrials and problems ahead of us , al
once, we would feel defealed before
we start.
The rose-colored g lasses g rad ually
have to go. But remove them gently:
don't rip them from a child 's face.
l f you tell your child how rotten
the world is, he will likely nol be–
Jieve it is so bad. And lhere is no
purpose served by shouling, "You
wail till you have to earn your own
living. lt's tough out there! " What
you say is true. But you will make
more progress by posilive instruc–
tion. Show the fruits of the wrong
way. When all the facts are
presented in an atmosphere of rea–
son, few children will knowingly
and imperiously choose the auto–
malic curses of the wrong way.
It
ís up to you lo maintain an
atmosphere of reason. lf you conlin–
ually discourage your child, he will
become bitter and resen1ful. Then
he wiU become more susceptible 10
wrong ínfiuences. You must main–
tain an atmosphere of reason by
being reasonablc and fair yourself.
God says-and let's a lways remem–
ber it- "Fathers. provoke not your
children to anger, lest they be dis–
couraged" (Col. 3:21).
How to Teach Obedience
Finally. you should teach your chil–
dren obedience mainly by settirig
them an example of respect for the
Laws of God and man. Teach them
to respond quickly when instruc–
tions are given. Be sure you have
your child's attention, then tell him
what you want him to do. Back up
your words with discipline if neces–
sary- in !ove.
Above a ll things, don't constantly
use the phrase, " How many times
do
1
have to tell you . ..?" or "Do
you want a s panking?" or " If you
don ' t do as
1
said, l'm going to ...."
That is no1 etfeclively teaching obe–
dience. l nstead. you are encour–
aging delayed response, teaching
the psychology of last-minute es–
capes and the deathbed repentance
syndrome.
You shou ld teach your chi ldren
the principies behind obedience. In
your regular Bible studies, point out
the clear lessons of what happened
to those who obeyed God and those
who d isobeyed. Always stress this
vital principie so that the lesson is
dri ven home.
Remember your real goal is long–
term , willing obed ience.
It
is not
somelhing short-lerm like getting
your child to go to bed. You
certainly cannot expect real
lasting obedience to God or man if
you take such a shortsighted ap–
proach.
Keep your long-term goal in
mind. So lomon described it: " My
son, if lhine hearl be wise, my hea rt
shall rejoice, even mine. Yea, my
reins shall rejoice, when thy lips
speak right lhings" (Prov. 23: 15-16).
Solomon saw the proper goal was
more than temporary obedience.
When you r child is no longer a
child; when he reaches maturity and
enjoys a life of happiness, balance,
wisdom and sound judgment, with–
oul lhe cares and kickbacks of dis–
obedience, 1hen you can say that
your child lra ining has been a suc–
cess. You will have accomplished
the real goal of child rearing!
O
RECOMMENDED READING
The Worldwide Church of God pub·
lishes an attractively printed booklet
entitled The Seven Laws of Success.
Your children need lo know about
these seven princtples. They apply to
virtually all age groups. Write for your
free copy.
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