Basic HTML Version
part in proper sexual devel–
opment of the child and may
determine whether or not he
wi/1 be vulnerable lo sexual
exploitation, Plain Truth cor–
respondent Peter Butler inter–
viewed Dr. Lowenstein on
what parents can do to in–
culcate a right approach
towardsex.
P
LAIN TRUTH: What should par–
ents do to guard against any
baneful preconditioning of the
child's mind toward sex?
LOWENSTEIN:
Parents have to give
their children positive teaching to
counteract the later negative in–
fluences they are Iikely to encounter.
The only way todo this is through a
relationship with their child that is
warm, free and tolerant, because in
this sort of situation the child is
more likely to heed the advice given
by the parents and also the example
they set. They themselves must im–
bue the child with a sense of right
and wrong and an understanding of
why
it is right todo sorne things and
not o1hers.
lt
should nol be merely a
slern "This is righl; lhis is wrong."
This kind of discussion should be
a contin uing process start ing righl
from l he beginning. Parents
shouldn't try to set slandards sud–
denly when their children are teen–
agers. T his is where parents make a
big mistake.
a.
Even if there is correct education
in the home, is there an added dan–
ger
if
children are contlnually watch–
ing dubious TV programs and films
which exploit sex?
A.
The mass media is, of course. a
powerful infiuence on a child's life.
and on everybody's life. There have
been investigations as to the etfect
of television on people, and there is
no question thal if you continue lo
see films which portray extremes of
violence or sexual behavior which is
sad istic or devoid of posi1ive educa–
lional content, it will influence the
way you live and treal o ther people.
lt
can have the etfecl, on both the
parents and the chi ldren. of either
making them callous toward sexual
behavior or preconditioning them to
accepl certain forms of "sex–
ploitation."
a.
And yet at present the media
presents sex with a certain amount
of glamour whlch adds a respect–
ability to its exploltatlon.
A.
Ves, again, a one-sided view of
things, and if youngsters haven't
been imbued wilh any sorl of stan–
dards by their parents, they become
more susceptible 10 the attractions
that such exploitation appears to of–
fer . T hey mighl evcn come to con–
sider it the accepted thing. This is
particularly so in thc case of chi l–
dren whose parents go so far as to
teach them that there are no stan–
dards. or lo imply by example that
anything goes. or that sex indepen–
dent ofhuman emotion and concern
is what is paramount. Their children
don't ever see sex as playing a con–
tributory parl in a wonderfuL
wholesome and complete relation–
ship between two devoted people.
where sex is but one of a number of
ways for showing !ove and affection.
a .
lt has been sald that a child who
"There is no concern
for human feelings.
Pornography might be
defined as dehumanized
sexual behavior."
doesn't find love and companion–
ship in the home may seek solace
elsewhere, and in so doing can be
led into sexual relationships that he
or she considers offer a warmth, a
love and compassion that he or she
has never found before. But in effect,
this is only a klnd of sexual gratifica–
tion. Can you elucidate on that?
A.
Sex is a very interesting phenom–
enon. It is a contac1 of bodies. T his
activity can be isola1ed 10 purely
seeking sexual gratification. and
there are people who have never
experienced a warm. intimate re la–
tionship with another human being
which involves tenderness. warmth
and atfection. The relationship is
merely restricted to the sex acl, and
because that's al l they've ever
known. they become adjus ted lo ac–
cepting that this is what it is all
about. Sexploitation will appear to
otfer them what they cannot find al
home. yel it is not atfection, really.
but merely a kind of sexual gratifi-
cation. T hey do not consider there is
anything else toa relationship.
This is the kind of experience to
which children are pron·e who are
not g iven proper ins tru ct ion or
shown proper atfection in the
horne- a cold, shallow approach to
sex which, however, appears to otfer
them more " love" than they ever
gol at home.
Now this isn'l to say that sexual
activity ca n go wrong simply be–
cause of your home life.
It
cou ld go
wrong because you have had a very
unfortunate relationship with sorne
member of the opposite sex when
you were younger, and you say to
yourself, 'Tm never going to get in–
volved again with anyone else. 1'11
just leave it at sex." But , again, this
is not so likely to happen to young
people who have been imbued wilh
correct standards and given bal–
anced instruclion and a warm home
re lationship.
a.
Can pornography have the same
effect, even if a person isn't actually
lnvolved in promiscuous sexual ac–
tivity?
A.
Yes. The sex act is portrayed as a
mechanical operation in which the
all-important thing is to seek merely
for physical gratification. This is un–
doubtedly importan!. But the per–
son who is oriented towards purely
the mechanics can ultimately be–
come bored with all lhe normal as–
pecls and responses ofsex and. in so
doing, will need to seek more and
more unusual ways of expressing
himself or herself. This will never
lead lo a full and meaningful total
relationship.
Pornography
otfers
sensual
delights in the form of pure eroti–
cism without emotional linkage to
ano1her human being about whom
care is felt. But we have to realize
the relationship must come under
one ultimate umbrella or another.
i.e. , does it come under the umbrella
of compassion. warmth. !ove and a
total relationship. or is the end in
itself 1he purely physical seeking af–
ler more and more ways to get phys–
ica l gratification,
and totally
ignor ing the human aspects of the
re lationship? T his is the danger of
pornography. T here is no concern
for human feelings. Pornography
might be defined as dehumanized
sexual behavior.
o
17