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40
ents involved with much consistency,
and with any efficiency.
Other than that,
we are scientifically in an excellent
position"
(ibid., p.
43).
Many "solutions" have been sug–
gested, among them the elimination of
all physical discipline, rejection of cor–
poral punishment of children and elimi–
nation of poverty from society. Fami ly–
planning programs, with family-life
education and counseling programs for
adolescents and adults in preparation
for marriage and child rearing have also
been suggested - along with a nation–
wide community health service to
promote mental health for everyone.
Careful consideration would convince
anyone that certainly it would be good
to eliminate poverty. All would agree
that right educational guidance is neces–
sary for all would-be young married
couples. But would we all agree as to
just what that educational program
should entail?
The subject of corporal punishment
is also f raught with emotion. Many
people, seeing the incidence of child
abuse, leap to the conclusion that par–
ents should never use any form of
corrective discipline. But total per–
missiveness in child rearing is equally as
bad as a cruel temper-tantrum approach.
What is the right approach?
The RIGHT APPROACH to
Child Rearing
Many families never seem to get the
right balance in child rearing. They go
to one extreme or the other - the
extreme of actual brutality, or the
extreme of permissiveness and lack of
proper controls.
The right approacb to child rearing is
the BALANCEO approach. In the long
run, the effects of "no discipline" are
just as severe as the effects of over-dis–
cipline. For example, suppose your little
18-month-old boy wasn't taught to obey
your instructions. For a moment your
attention was distracted f rom him, and
he toddled into the street.
You saw him, and yelled - "STOP!
- stay out of the street." But he just
looked at you, kept toddling, to be hit
and killed by an automobile.
He had
not been ta11ght
to obey your command
of "stop!"
The
PLAIN TRUTH
This tragic example illustrates the
point. Children NEED to be taught to
OBEY their parents. They need a com–
bination of positive instruction and edu–
cation, combined with LOVJNG discipline
and punishment when they disobey.
I t's for the child's safety and well -being.
Parents need to teach their children
to come when called, to put toys away,
to eat that which they should, and to
LISTEN to instructions. It is not a simple
matter, and parents need to be patient
and persevering in giving such instruc–
tion. But the positive methods of teach–
ing and instruction, followed by swift,
never-failing and suitable discipline
for infractions, is the only workable
combination!
The facts show that chi ldren reared
this way tend to become the best–
behaved, most orderly, friendly, out–
going, and loving children - because
their parents care enough about them to
take time with them. In the long
run, such children become respectful,
polite, well-mannered, and friendly.
Friends and neighbors will be amazed
at the sparkling behavior of your
children.
How to Discipline
There is never any excuse for parents
to lose their tempers at the misbehavior
of their own children. Parents who lose
their tempers, and punish tbeir children
in ANGER, or hatred, are unqualified to
even be parents. How can parents
expect to teach their children self-dis–
cipline and self-control, unless they
themselves exhibit it?
Unfortunately, most parents punish
their children only when they feel
drivm
to do it - as a last resort. By
that time, chances are, the parents have
lost a measure of self-control and lash
out in frustration toward the child.
They have waited too long - Jet the
problem get out of hand. Then they
EXPLODE in anger.
Rather,
effective
discipline should
always be administered at the time of
the o.ffense, and in proportion to the
severity of the infraction - and it
should be administered out of
cm1cern
for the child,
thinking of the child's
welfare. A child should NEVER be
bruised or injured!
July
1971
But that is not all.
Once the discipline is administered,
the child should be made to know that
he is completely forgiven and is now in
the good graces of the parent. When
discipline is correctly given, parents are
usually surprised at how quickly the
child will repent of his wrong action,
say he is sorry, and even throw his arms
around Mom's or Dad's neck.
The important thing that any parent,
or parent-to-be, must remember is that
if he correctly applies discipline, and
also shows positive !ove and instruction
in the home during the formative years
of the children, his children will not
grow up to be wild, fractious, rebellious,
hostile or delinquent. "As the twig is
bent, the tree will grow," is an old
adage, but a true one.
On the other hand, if parents fail to
properly apply discipline and
/oving
instruction within their family, then in
later years
society itself
will bave to do
the job they neglected - only with
much greater severity and harshness !
Act Now
One of the major causes of "battered
babies," today, is a general widespread
lack of right instruction in child rearing.
What can you do about it?
If
you
take this problem seriously - if you
feel a deep responsibility as a parent or
parent-to-be - then take note.
Ambassador College has been deeply
concerned about proper child rearing
for many years. We have published a
143-page book on this vitally important
subject. Sorne of the chapter titles are:
"What Is a Child ?" "Criminals Are
Made, Not Born !"
•<y
ou Can Punish
Your Children - In Love!" "How to
Get Results !" and
•<y
our Children At
Play."
No parent can afford to be without
this vital instruction - it should be
read in every home.
A free copy of the book is waiting
for you. We will be happy to send it to
you as quickly as we receive your
request through the mail. Just ask for
the book entitled
The Plain Tmth Abo1tt
Chi/d Rearing.
Send your request to the
address nearest you listed on the inside
front cover of this magazine. O