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Connecticut paid each of the foster
homes l 'd lived in.)
She had a few basic rules and so
did
l.
1 stated at the outset that 1
would run my own life and agreed
to be home by
11,
etc.
My life had taken a turn for the
better, thanks to Bill Cohen-who
encouraged me to take control of
my life; Schummer- who was a
true and supportive friend; Mrs.
Sheehan
(1
most often referred to
her as my landlady)- who was will–
ing to take a chance on me; and
myself-who began to take control
of my life, even if only a tentative,
uncertain control.
1
was beginning
to come alive. The longtime feeling
of being detached slowly began to
fade. For t he next two years
1
was
mostly concerned with my social
life, much to the detriment of my
school life.
1
stopped studying and
my attendance was spotty.
1
was
very uncomfortable with the social
scene at school but was beginning
to come alive socially with my
neighborhood friends and girl
friends.
1
seemed to feel the need for
girlfriend relationships more ur–
gently than the other fellows did.
1
frequented dances and at times
hitchhiked in blizzard conditions to
get to one.
I
began to get involved
with folk music.
l began to lose respect for
aut hority.
1
started drinking ,
smoking pot and snorti ng heroin .
lt was more a playing-around sit–
uation than a dependence on
them. ( In retrospect it was a dan–
gerous thing to do because as
much as
I
was a prime candidate
for other kinds of delinquency,
1
was certainly a prime candidate
for addiction.)
1
quit high school in my second
senior year and was feeling quite
defiant about it. Sorne months later
1
got a job at a hospital as an
orderly and had a room there too.
1
stayed in close touch with my
friends.
1
began to play guitar,
mostly folk music. Even though 1
wasn't able to play well 1 enjoyed it
and played with intensity.
Shortly 1 received my draft
not ice and decided to enlist so 1
could become a medie. At 19 l
embarked on a road that would
take me through basic training,
medie training, advanced medica!
28
trammg, Vietnam, Germany, and
finally home.
In t he Army
Advanced medica! training at Val–
ley Forge Army Hospital was likc
being
in
college.
1
started off with
good grades, but they declined as
my social life became more active.
One of the other students played
guitar and sang and we played
together. We had a natural harmo–
ny and it impressed the girls who
didn't know too much about music.
l barely graduated.
l had volunteered for duty in
Vietnam. 1 was assu red that 1
would have hospital duty and not
field duty. That year and a half of
medica! training cost the Army a
bundle of money and they weren't
going to waste it by putting me on
the front line, right? Wrong!
When
1
arrived in Vietnam in
December 1968,
1
was assigned to
the IOlst Airmobile Division that
operated about 30 miles south of
the Demilitarized Zone ( DMZ), in
the mountains from the coast to
Laos.
l
spent six months on fire–
bases that were constructed on
mountaintops, a nd six months in
the field humping up and down
mountains with 90 pounds of food,
weapons and medica! supplies on
my back.
As a company medie
1
was the
senior medica! person in the field
and had that responsibility for 100
men and four platoon medies.
lt
was one of those situations where
1
was forced to rise to the occasion,
and
1
d id. On a number of occa–
sions
1
risked my life and was high–
ly decorated.
A good medie in Vietnam was
treated with great respect. Medies
were often the only apparent sym–
bols of humanity.
1
gained a pro–
found moral commitment to save
life, even the lives of the "ene–
my."
1 left Vietnam like a hollow shell
of my former self. 1 was in a state
of shock, for what 1 had seen on the
battlefield was unbearably vulgar
and inhuman. 1 was functíoning but
that's all . 1 carne back from the war
in December 1969. During the
remaining nine mon ths i n the
Army the pain from the war grad–
ually deepened. 1 started doing
drugs again, this time shooting
opium, taking L.S.D., whatever
was in front of me. l was al the
lowest point in my Iife and could
not even
sp~ak
a full sentence with–
out stuttering, something .l'd never
done before.
1 did not date socially for 1 could
not tolerate a superficial relation–
ship anymore. About six months
before my discharge J received
notice from the Red Cross that my
landlady had died.
1
flew home
immediately and arrived in Water–
bury just as the funeral was begin–
ning.
I
could not sit in the front
with the family and fr iends.
1
stood
in back completely overcome by
grief, sobbing.
I
had lost a dear
friend and the only home
1
ever
had. l don ' t know what got me
through this period more or less
intact.
1
carne back to Waterbury after
my discharge and started college.
That lasted for about three weeks.
It was all so superficial and
1
did
not fit in at all. Having no home
1
was living in the woods, a place
where
1
felt most at borne after
having become accustomed to that
kind of living in Vietnam. That was
a short-lived arrangement as it was
au tumn and the nights brought
freezing temperatures. Three
friends and
l
decided to d r ive to
California where the weather was a
little more conducive to outdoor
living.
1
was s till pretty shaken by
the events of the last two years, but
l wasn' t doing hard d rugs anymore
and was beginning to lighten up
emot ionally.
1Meet Jac k le
We arrived in Fresno, California, in
early autumn and stayed at the
house of Schummer's friend Jackie,
who would soon become the lady in
my life.
At that time J ackie, who'd hada
rather severe life up to that point,
was at a low point in her life. She'd
gotten to the same point 1 had as
far as human relationships go. Nei–
ther one of us could tolerate super–
ficiality or nonsense and it would
either be a honest and deep rela–
tionship or none at all.
Our first years of marriage were
filled with passion and nu rtur ing.
lt
seemed as though we were using
this time to stop reeling from the
(Continued on page 43)
The PLAIN TRUTH